Being Preggy

Sometimes I forget that I'm already pregnant, 7 weeks to be exact. Just a few months ago, my mind is circling with worry and bouts of fear of infertility, and now, I have a miracle inside my tummy!

During the praise and worship time awhile ago, I cannot help but be amazed on how good God is! He really is amazing, a good good Father who gives His children the desires of their hearts. So grateful to be a mommy-in-the-making!

Although I must admit, my body surprises me a lot these days. Some days are worse and some days are better. These days are better. Last week, I would stare listlessly at the bread in front of me, contemplating whether my stomach would agree with it or not. I also say no every time my husband offers to cook me breakfast, because even the thought makes me heady and nauseous. And if you know me and my appetite, you would know that this is a major change! Lol! Because people know me as the girl who is constantly hungry and is always on the hunt for snacks. That's me! So alam mo na bakit malaki pisngi ko! :P

And how far I have gone since that day! Minsan lang to, so sulitin ko na!

Physically, there are a lot of changes. Emotionally, I guess you should ask Dennis about that. I think he would tell you that I am more sensitive and my clinginess went up a few notches higher. He also backed away a few steps from teasing me. Kung dati mga once every 5 minutes nangaasar siya, ngayon mga twice a day nalang! So siya talaga ang nagadjust dito! :P

Financially, lol! Well let me just say that we didn't realize that we would be using our baby fund this soon! Pero at least may baby fund na! :P So we're building that particular silo as we speak...

There are a lot of changes and I know there will be more in the coming weeks and months. Motherhood changes you, that much I know. I know my life would be so different once our baby is born, and there's a part of me that is much like Peter-ye-of-little-faith that feels a pang of fear of the uncertainty of it all.

Like will I still be working in the ministry once the baby is born? Will we get a helper? Will I stay at home? Will I still be able to finish Book 3 of our Actventure journal? What will happen??

I remember last year, I was looking at a mother and his 2 year old son and how her body is much tied to his needs. She wanted to play volleyball with the rest of her friends but her son would always call her back. So in the end, she just fended for his son and she wasn't able to play -- and I just had to ask myself, can I be that selfless when the time comes? I have so much admiration for mothers all around the world! Kaya natatatanong ko talaga sarili ko, kaya ko ba yun?!

But just as quickly as these thoughts cross my mind, I am reminded to be grateful and to be content where I am now. Why should I worry about all of those things when God just answered our prayer? Didn't he already proved to be faithful and good that I should doubt him now?

So that's kind of where my mind is at these days. But thank God for reminding me that He is my helper and always will be... and that He goes before me all the days of my life. He will grant me supernatural strength and wisdom and with Him by my side, I will never be in lack!

So thank You Jesus, for the gift of today! And for holding my hand all throughout this new season that we're about to embark... parenthood, here we come!