Somebody give me a more apt analogy please

Hello there! Got back from Pulag last night and yes, we reached the peak 3! It was the best our bodies could do! 4 hours going and 4 hours heading back... there were moments when we did ask ourselves, bakit ba natin to gnagawa?? But it was such a relief when our group was able to make it!

I haven't had exercise for months, I jogged last week but that was it... So you can just imagine how my prayers were going days before we left. I seriously didn't know if I can make it (hindi naman patay level pero hingal and give up!) but God, with His grace and  mercy, pulled us through! Praise God!

It was physically draining... emotionally too. I'm not sure if I will be able to post this entry because I just really want to share what has been going on in my mind and heart.. I am so conflicted lately but I keep trying, and encouraging myself when it comes to my relationship with Ed. Several well-meaning friends have stopped me in my tracks and posed meaningful questions for me to reconsider and don't haste when it comes our relationship. But maybe it's both fear and hope that made me hold on with fervent prayers that things would go my way -- that it's going to be fine. That the future in my head will be exactly how I expected it to be..

It was only a few days ago when I was confronted with a situation that called me out of it... I guess God had to do it because I kept negotiating with him, haggling for mine and Ed's future.

It was the cherry on top, so to speak, but it was nothing but bitter. It wasn't the be-all and end-all of everything, but that takes the cake (how ironic are my analogies! Parang ang sararap ng mga analogies ko nh! Just making light of this heavy sitch) and every single thing, every single person who has approached me, every single circumstance that have made me doubt was set clear on stone-- staring at me in the face and replacing my false hope with the truth.

No matter how much I prayed for my plans, God's plan will prevail.

I've been crying for days now... good thing that the rest of my face has been sunburned so it matches my puffy eyes. Mukhang pagod lang!

Nakakalungkot but we have to face the music (there goes that nice analogy again!)...